Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
