For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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