i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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