Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
