just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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