I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Randomize
