Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
