In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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