WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
His hands were made for my vagina.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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