Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Randomize
