i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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