: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Don't make out with my wife yet
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Randomize
