I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
