no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
