heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Randomize
