hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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