There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
