YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize
