i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
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