i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Randomize
