1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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