Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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