Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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