Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Randomize
