I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
