You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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