You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
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