Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
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