Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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