grandma shit on top of the toilet
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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