Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
