You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
