Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
