Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize