I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
