Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
