rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
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