im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
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