She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
