i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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