It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
