Grow some girl-balls and come out already
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
PANTIES FOUND
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
