Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
did i just pee glitter
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
