erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Randomize
