Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I am naked and annoyed.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Randomize
