I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
