We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
