Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
My ATM looks so different sober.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
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