An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
