guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize