your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize
